How to Build Stairs That Fall Apart

My father is one of those guys that refuse to call a professional. If he was a handyman of any measure, that would be quite all right. But bless him, he really shouldn’t be measuring or cutting anything beyond his own sandwiches. Thanks to his last do-it-yourself adventure, I can tell you exactly how to build stairs the wrong way.

First of all, you don’t need to take any measurements. Pretend to ignore the subtle and most blatant of hints from people who think you ought to use a measuring tape. Evade probing questions like, how big are the stairs are going to be once you finish?

Use your eyeballs, that’s what they’re there for. You can’t go wrong. And if you end up wasting space, or if your stairs are so wobbly and crazy-looking that they appear to have been constructed by a drunk teenager, just smile and tell everyone that your stairs have character.

Be sure to cut every single piece beforehand! Don’t waste time figuring out if they’ll fit together. Get that junk out of the way and cut everything first. Yes, things may not line up correctly and you could end up wasting dozens of pieces of wood.

If your lucky stars happen to be in alignment that day, all those pieces just might fit together seamlessly to create the perfect stairs. Or maybe not. Hey, what matters is you’re having a ball either way.

Most importantly, don’t use quality wood. In fact, use whatever wood you might find lying on the side of the road, or found in old shacks in the woods.

This way, you’ll save money. Can you trust the stairs to last more than a few months? Well, that doesn’t matter! Come on, it’s not as if you spent real money on them.

Working on a new stair project? Visit Build Stairs and discover How To Build Stairs quickly and easily without the headaches. We even cover Hardwood Stairs!

- Jessica N